Thursday, October 26, 2017

Growing up Gals: Fearful or Fearless?

As we grow older, do we become more fearful or fearless of things around us?
For me, I knew my fears pretty early in life – fear of heights, fear of roller-coaster, fear of cockroaches. And sadly, the 3 fears have grown up together with me, like my unwanted best friends.

So I was fascinated to see how this phenomena will turn out in my girls’ lives.

Joey (11 years old), typical first born child (like me). Independent, bossy, self-motivated (like me).
Jayne (8 years old), typical younger sibling (if there is one). Shows more public affections, not as independent, slightly less motivated (like Kless’ brother).

Just a few years back, I remembered that Joey was still a timid girl, not willing to try most of the activities that required her to climb or jump or with speed. Of course, I am more than willing to accompany her since I am one not given to fast speed activities too. But on hind sight, I am thinking did I stifle her growth in courage or trust by not encouraging her to try?
Jayne on the other hand, was more willing to take the water slides and do the 4D rides, etc.

As time passed, things seems to change a bit. Joey grew bolder and Jayne took lesser interest in the exciting stuff.

We brought the girls to a small indoor rock climbing studio recently. Hoping that the girls will have a chance to try it out and learn something new. Especially for Jayne, she has always like to do such rock climbing activities.

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My Little Climbing Room is situated at Promenade @ Pelikat, which is in Hougang area. As you can see, it is quite a colorful place and both my girls liked it immediately.

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The climbing walls are categorized as fun, beginners, intermediate and advance. The fun walls are like the ones shown above, where the kids can just climb up and touch randomly selected numbers or go through the hula-hoops. Both of these walls do not required other equipment or ropes.

In fact, when Joey stood beside the number wall, she is almost half way there.

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While Jayne took a bit more effort, but nonetheless it was not difficult for them.

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Joey gave up on the hula-hoops obstacle course as she is more like her dad, quite stiff boned. Thankfully, we still have Jayne (that’s why it’s good to have more than one child). And her size is just perfect.

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Another fun wall is to climb and touch the dots on the wall, and do it in the fastest time.

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So far so good, until when we got to the more serious climbs. This was when I was suddenly buffered by Jayne’s reactions.

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Jayne the courageous girl has become the timid gal, she was afraid of the heights and possible fall even though she was tightly supported by the ropes. On the other hand, Joey passed the test! She conquered all the 3 levels of rock climbing walls and was eager to do it again and again (until her fingers are too tired to grip anything).

What happened??

Is Jayne going through a stage of self realization? Realizing that she is not that “garang” anymore? Are the changes due to peer pressure in school?
One became fearful and the other became fearless.

Girls, if you are reading this post, Daddy is not telling you to be fearful or fearless. In life, never swing to the extremes, there is nothing absolutely fearful nor is there anything absolutely fearless.

“Fear not, be of good cheer, be strong and courageous.”

Don’t be fearful of anything, cos you have daddy and Daddy to take care of you. But be of good courage, learn to say “no” or to protect yourself when the need arises.
Don’t be fearless and live life with no discipline. Only with discipline can one learn to build character.

In the meantime, just enjoy the fun!

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